Posted on by agilejack

Farewell Bender

I said my final farewell to Bender on Tuesday afternoon. The house is terribly quiet. Rico and I are sad.

Redsky Bender 4/9/13 – 12/9/25

He had gone downhill so quickly since his 12th birthday in April. He was almost totally deaf and blind. He had increasing dementia that was so puzzling to watch. He was more and more wobbly and fell down several times a day. I had to help him stand up pretty regularly.

Bender was the happiest dog I’ve ever owned. Absolutely nothing phased him. Throughout his life with epilepsy, he never let it bother him. He never let it negatively affect him. I was the one who carried that burden. But his refusal to be affected by it helped me deal with it as well.

He was also the most photogenic dog on earth. He really never took a bad photo.

I knew this time was coming. When my friends saw him at Thanksgiving after not seeing him for 8 months, all three of them said, “Anne, it’s time to let him go.”

On Tuesday he told me it was time. I called the vet with tears in my eyes and asked if they could get him in. They had an opening. We had a couple hours to cuddle on the sofa, eat lots of cheese and some ice cream, and just enjoy hour last moments together.

He loved al the attention he got at the vet. And the staff there was so amazing. I think that letting a pet go is a generous gift we can give them… a peaceful, dignified, quiet passing with their favorite people helping them on their journey.

It’s such a difficult deicision to make. But I know it was the right one.

211 Replies to “Farewell Bender”

  2. Anne, my heart is aching for you. I too am an avid dog lover. I grew up with dogs and my husband did too. There is no pain greater than loosing your humans and dogs. They are so innocent and loving no matter what. We lost my “husbands soul dog” 8-16-24. She was an ivory lab. He had been laid off and I was still working when we got her. He bonded with her, he laid on the floor and played with her all day every day. She went to the bathroom often as he asked her and took her out often. I thought he would die when she was gone. His heart was truly broken. You definitely did the right thing. And yes it is the most dignified caring thing you can give back to them for all the happiness and love they gave to us. Only the passing of time makes this all make sense. And it seems to take forever………. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

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  3. Anne, my heart is aching for you. I too am an avid dog lover. I grew up with dogs and my husband did too. There is no pain greater than loosing your humans and dogs. They are so innocent and loving no matter what. We lost my “husbands soul dog” 8-16-24. She was an ivory lab. He had been laid off and I was still working when we got her. He bonded with her, he laid on the floor and played with her all day every day. She went to the bathroom often as he asked her and took her out often. I thought he would die when she was gone. His heart was truly broken. You definitely did the right thing. And yes it is the most dignified caring thing you can give back to them for all the happiness and love they gave to us. Only the passing of time makes this all make sense. And it seems to take forever………. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

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  4. I am so so very sorry for your loss. It is always heartbreaking to lose our furry companions.

    He was a beautiful boy. And I have loved seeing all pictures of him and Rico.

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  6. oh I am so sad to read this. Well I am balling my eyes out. I have an elderly dog with dementia and each day I worry that I will have to make that call, the hardest one to make.

    You gave him his best life. Thank you for bringing us along on his adventures.

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  7. Ann, I’m so very sad over the news about Bender. I’d say he had quite a fantastic lifeWith you and Rico!  Something about him always gave me warm fuzzies when you’dpost a comical picture and story.  I paintedhim some time ago (from the pic th

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  8. ((((( Anne & Rico ))))) I am so sorry about your Bender ~ it’s hard but the right thing to do.   At 68 I’ve had to let go of so many fur friends, often near holidays even in early childhood – or are those just the ones that I have a date to remember.  At this point I don’t rememberall the dates but I remember Them all ~ we’re lucky to have them for as long as we do.Still hard. Bender was a good dog, a good friend ~ Big hugs, Dea Houser in NC – we’re down to one kitty and one Martha Bones (a foundling gifted to us, all signs pointed to Border Collie, but testing for funshowed that she’s Beagle-Aussie Shepherd with a dash of poodle!)

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  10. Anne –

    Your email brought tears to my eyes. I can feel your love of Bender, and his zest for life. Like you, we’ve had many dogs, each of them such individuals, but all with unconditional love. It’s so hard to let them go.

    I wish we had a puppy for you. Our Cava-poo and our Shih Tzu / Bichon Frisse had puppies on October 4. 6 happy little souls. They are now 10 weeks, and 1 has found a Forever Home. 2 more are going to their new homes on Christmas. I cannot believe how I miss the little guy, but they grow up. We are keeping 3. So if you want some puppy love, please contact me. I’m here in Portland, a sustainer at your business place, and a quilter. (We are just west of Sylvan.)

    Thank you for all the inspiration for quilting too.

    Sincerely, Carol Hellebuyck 503-568-6016

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  11. I’m so sorry for your loss of Bender. It just hurts so much even though you absolutely did the right thing. May his memory be a blessing. ❤️ Ann Webb

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  15. oh I am so sorry. I know this is the hardest thing we have to do. I sit here crying because I know how much he ment to you. A dog is the greatest gift we have they understand us with no prejudice. 😓

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  16. Ann, my heart aches for you and I send a smile and many prayers. I have loved the pictures and stories about Bender, he was so photogenic. You made the right decision, as difficult as it is. I have been in your position many times. I’m so thankful we are able to do this for our dear beloved pets and end their pain.

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  18. The love you had for Bender and the love he had for you was a beautiful gift. Thank you for sharing him through your blog. I am so very sorry.

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  20. My heart goes out to you. It is such a hard thing to say goodbye to such a wonderful friend. I have enjoyed your posts about him and the his photos with quilts.

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  23. Anne – There are never enough days with our beloved dogs. Bender was a part of your family. He knew when you were there everything would be OK. You and Rico will be OK – it just takes time and you will always have your amazing memories he blessed you with. Sent hugs, Pam

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  24. He was beautiful. So sorry to hear you lost one of your best fur buddies. Each of our fur babies when they leave they leave paw prints many memories th

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  26. I am so sorry to hear your news. Bender was such a sweet friend to you. I always looked forward to your pictures of your boys. The hardest part of having a pet is letting go. This makes me think of my own sweet dog who we lost 2 years ago. My heart goes out to you!

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  27. I’m just so sorry. It stinks, but no matter what, they’re always worth the pain in the end. Thanks for all the quilting stories, too. Thinking of you…..Linda

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  29. Anne, I’m so sorry for you about the loss of one of your constant companions. I’ve never had a pet myself, but sister and some of my friends have had very sick animals and have had to let them go. Let yourself grieve for as long as feels right to grieve . You did the kindest thing for him. We’ll all feel sad right along with you.

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  30. Anne, I’m so sorry for you about the loss of one of your constant companions. I’ve never had a pet myself, but sister and some of my friends have had very sick animals and have had to let them go. Let yourself grieve for as long as feels right to grieve . You did the kindest thing for him. We’ll all feel sad right along with you.

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  32. My deepest condolences. It is amazing how much we are impacted by our pets…our best friends really. I went thru the same thing almost 2 years ago and it is like it happened yesterday. Your email touched my heart. ‘Keenu’ our cat lived into his 18th year. In honor of Keenu I created a catfish fabric collage quilt with Keenu’s face as the main feature.

    [A close-up of a cat AI-generated content may be incorrect.][cid:image003.png@01DC6DF2.B61624D0][cid:image002.png@01DC6D90.9BDD6BD0]

    Know that you are not alone. We can only cherish the precious moments we have with our pets. I could see how special Bender was to you. What you went thru was so difficult, but you knew the time had come and it was the right thing to do. Our pets sense that it was time to go…

    Please take care of yourself
    Sincerely,
    Brenda Carter

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  35. Awwww Anne, that is a hard thing to do. Bless your heart and poor Rico. It is lonesome and not something you get over really. I am sorry.

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  37. I’m so sorry to hear of Bender’s passing. I so enjoyed your pictures and posts about him-so filled with happiness and joy. Hugs to you and Rocco, hope all the kind words from your many fans soothes your hearts!

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  38. I shed tears as I read your post! I love your dogs as I loved mine and know that time will only lessen the pain you feel right now. There always will be a spot in your heart for Bender.

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  39. Such a lovely tribute to Bender. Thank you for sharing that with all of us. It is so hard to say goodbye to a beloved pet.

    Sending you warm thoughts.

    Regards

    Joan

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  40. I am so sorry for your loss. I have had to make the same decision but I know it was the right one. So hard. Bender was great!
    Sent from my iPhone

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  41. I have so enjoyed all of the adventures you have shared over the years of Bender. I too am so sad to learn of his passing. I have always believed that helping our animals at the end of their life is the last kindness we can show them. Bender is so deserving of your grief at this time. Dogs aren’t our whole life, but they make our life whole. LuAnn in Western Oregon https://luannkessi.blogspot.com/

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  44. Oh, Anne, I have tears in my eyes reading about sweet Bender. He was an amazing dog with fans all over the world. Thank you for sharing him with us. I am sending you my heartfelt condolences: every dog lover knows how difficult this was/is for you.

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  45. Anne and Rico,

    I was saddened to read of Benders passing. It was always such a joy sharing his adventures with you. He will be missed by many.

    Sending hugs to you and pats to Rico,

    ~toni

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  46. I’m so sad for you and Rico. I’ve so looked forward to your posts that included your dogs.

    Yahoo Mail: Search, Organize, Conquer

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  47. He was your Gift…..you did the very brave thing to send him to Heaven where he will make lots of new friends. I lost my husband and my soul mate several months ago…..62 years of Love. Our rat terrier was really his guy and now it’s just us. We are clinging together …he’s 13 1/2 and now I know he will be leaving soon too. Grief is so hard. Coco in Oregon

    http://www.avg.com/email-signature?utm_medium=email&utm_source=link&utm_campaign=sig-email&utm_content=webmail Virus-free.www.avg.com http://www.avg.com/email-signature?utm_medium=email&utm_source=link&utm_campaign=sig-email&utm_content=webmail <#DAB4FAD8-2DD7-40BB-A1B8-4E2AA1F9FDF2>

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  49. What a sweet boy he must have been. When our cat’s time was up, our vet said comforting words as follows: It is the kindest last thing you can do for her.”

    I’m so sorry for your loss.

    Jennie

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  50. Anne and Rico,

    I am so sorry to hear the news, it’s so hard to say “so long for now”. Our fur babies love us with the purest light. My wish is that the wonderful memories flood in every time your heart hurts. We’ve been through this several times in our life, but opening our hearts and home to the pups and kitties have been the best choices. Be well, I look forward to your posts. Wishing you a serene holiday season and a hopeful New Year! Susi B.

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